Good day dear listeners and welcome again to overcoming temptations, My name is Oyisi Okatahi. Today our topic is titled “Do not rush into a relationship”.
The bible in 1 Corinthians 13:4 says love is patient, so love will not rush but will wait patiently to understand before acting. Like is such that most things that are easy to get are also easy to loose. That is why people say easy come easy go. If it takes you only a weekend to meet a woman and marry as a wife, then it could take only a weekend to also divorce her or desert her. Today and especially in some part of the western world, children can call up their parents and tell them, Dad Mum I am getting married this weekend. They barely even know the person they are getting married to, they do not care about parental consent or what the bible recommends we do before marriage. So when you get into such a marriage you find out that all that glitters is not gold, you find out it is not exactly what you expected and in most cases you begin to regret.
To avoid this, do not rush into a relationship or marriage, now this does not mean that you cannot identify and marrying someone within a very short while, what it means is that you should think more about the spiritual and hidden things than the physical things that seem very attractive.
Let me share with you some suggestions.
- For a woman, try and find out if the man really loves you. As a woman I will never advise you marry a man who does not love you, no matter how rich he may be. The reason is that you will not be happy with him. A man either loves you or does not. A woman several times can grow into loving a man that she did not initially love, but a man will rarely grow into loving a woman he did not initially love. So do not think that one day he will change his mind, if you sense he does not love you it is not worth it.
- Do not mistake sexual attraction and love. Many times people are only sexually attracted to each other. So if many want to be with you always and is asking for sex, do not be deceived even if he promises marriage. The whole idea is to sleep with you and when he is tired he looks for another person, his sexual interest will only last for a short time.
- Do not be carried away in a relationship but check for important things. You see it is possible that when two people meet for the first time there is an initial attraction. When I first met my wife I was instantly attracted to her, but that was not enough to marry her. You need to consider many things like family background, age, values, faith or religion, education, parental consent, pastoral advice, character, personality and so on. You should not marry someone just because you have a butterfly feeling for that person.
- Observe the way the persons treat others. When someone likes you they obviously treat you specially. But the real character of a person lies on how he or she treat other people not just you. So if a man will slap his driver because he is annoyed, then the chances that he can slap his wife when he is annoyed are very high. If a woman who is engaged to someone else is willing to still date you while she is still engaged, it means that if she is engaged or married to you she can still date another person. So assess how they treat others, their friends, parents, colleagues and so on.
- Finally be prayerful, it is God that directs our paths. Psalm1:6 says that the Lord knows the way of the righteous. So allow Him lead you in Jesus name.
Do not rush into any relationship; however it does not mean you should unnecessarily drag you feet. Be moderate. Have a blessed day.